Just So You'll Know

I told all my friends that if they ever saw you or have contacted slash communicated with you, I DON'T WANNA BE TOLD ABOUT IT.
we are already have been hurting enough as it is. I don't want to know what you've been up to. It's easier for the both of us that way.
And i would also appreciate it (a lot) if you don't judge me just cause i'm with my friends after work. I'd like to smoke my cigs with my friends even if they don't, the worst thing that i could have ever done is cry cause of you in public and while im at work.
no, ive never hooked up with anyone and i have no plans to do so. Yes, i'm vulnerable,but I'm not stupid.
I'm doing this partly cause I'm safe in my own bleak world and I have to stop hurting myself one step at a time.
by not caring for you that much anymore.

cause that's what you've been doing too.